The Tale of an ALS Survivor #17
Realizing that we will not always be in control gave me the space to mentally deal with this ALS mystery story.
After nine months from the diagnosis and almost complete dependence on others for survival, I felt I was getting better.
What did I find out about myself during this challenge?
I melt when the flame gets too hot.
My mind was my enemy, because it became the door to the next room. There always seems to be a next room. That idea is always in the back of my mind.
What’s Next.
This life had so many twists and turns. Each one marked my spiritual location on the Path since the diagnosis and physical declines.
ALS was a path I never dreamed of exploring. When I had to take another step, I usually was unready. But my team of helpers where always ready. I FOUND OUT I WAS TRULY LOVED AND NEEDED.
I was not out of the woods yet. I could still feel the missing connections in my nervous system.
Losing my balance, collapsing on to the ground, dropping things that were too heavy, trying to give myself a shower, trying to put on my own clothes, trying to wipe my own bottom, turning on a faucet for a glass of water, dreaming of tying my own shoes — this was just part of the list of what I imagined I would be able to do for myself one day.
I had never given my body much thought in the past. Now I was praising it for every move it made to serve my needs.
This was when I realized my inner Being felt fine; it was my body that had ALS.
What did ALS reveal to me? I was more than a body. Are you sure of that, McFinn?
Twice on my journey with ALS was I touched and given the chance to recover my life. That came from somewhere. I think more was happening than I ever REALLY knew. I had the experience of being Healed by the Power of Prayerful Souls. I had been touched in a way I had never experienced until I was under the threat of Death.
I was starting to be thankful for the challenges this disease had brought me once it started to subside. I knew how precious each muscle movement was that responded to my thoughts. What an amazing Creation we are.
When I found myself at the end of the road, my time seemed to be cut short. I wasn’t ready. I felt as if I had not finished this chapter in The Book of My Lives!
That was when I realized every day I could stay alive would be the greatest gift I could give my family and myself. Every day was a challenge, but I was ready more than ever, now that I was given a sign of Hope. A second chance to see what I truly treasured in life was starting to seem possible.
You may never know what is truly valuable until you lose it.
The two fingers on my right hand that still moved took high honors because they allowed me to control my wheelchair. Without them, I would have lost hope completely. With them still moving, I knew my nerves were not completely DEAD.
I did not find hope from the normal channels of medicine. My Naturopathic doctor was the only one to say, “Let’s dig deeper.”
9/7/06 Chelation report
I have been doing Chelation for two rounds, each round two and a half months apart. Lead sequestered in the bone is measured as μg/g of mineralized bone. My first lead release was 43ug/g. My release level was only 16ug/g the 2nd round. My next round two and a half months later released 49ug/g. 5 ug/g is considered the normal amount a human would have.
I believe the lead was part of the puzzle. I was glad I finally found it.
The DMSA oral Chelation agent I was taking — called Captomer — seemed a gentle way to chelate the lead inside my body. I could have chosen to have an IV Chelation treatment, which would have been quicker. But I was told this method could have released the lead too quickly and cause adverse reactions.
Slow but sure was my style. I learned patience from my journey with ALS.
A second chance to see what I truly treasured in life was starting to seem possible.
I had given up hope at one time, but not anymore. I gave away many of my belongings believing they would not serve me any longer in this life. It was nice to lighten my load, anyway.
But what I realized most was how precious every day of my life was. I am so thankful I did not end this challenge early. It turned out to be the deepest lesson of my Life.
We are here for a short time or a long time. To me the long time seemed the best. Now, I did not need a long time. I knew I was a Sacred Being just like each of YOU!! The rest were just the details of survival on a Planet in deep Space.
Just listening to myself breathing was comforting. I remember the first time I reached out to hold Mona’s hand. As I started to squeeze it, I smiled and tears ran down my face at the same time.
I was back in Mona’s Life. Thinking that I was going to lose her had been my deepest sadness. We had only been together five years. I had thought those five years in Mona’s world of high fashion and big parties was over. Maybe not.
My sex life was full of hugs and kisses from my Dear Mona. She gave me all the loving care she could.
I had been living in a world of fantasies for over nine months about our former sex life.
McFinn, you need to be more creative. That was my therapist’s comment when I told her our sex life had been lost.
I was becoming very creative since I graduated from squirming on the floor.
It had been quite a while since I tried to romance Mona. I had to be patient. When the right moment came along, I was not going to let it slip by, and I didn’t!!!
Mona and I where starting to See, Feel, and Touch our ALS Reversal. It felt as if we both had ALS because it was all we talked about. But now, we saw a future together.
I was trying to hurry my healing and Mona was Mad. “You’re going to get hurt and set back our progress if you keep falling. Slow down, McFinn.”
“Ok, ok, sorry Mona.”
I was stunned at what was happening, and wondered where was this headed?
